Kung Fu Humor: Subpar Subtitles

Time for another installment of Subpar Subtitles!

Sometimes the language barrier is harder to break than a stack of boards, and they say English is the hardest language of all to learn. Literal translations of cliches and sayings common to a particular language can be quite comical. Here's some screen caps of English subtitles taken from various kung fu and action films. Special thanks go out to Hong Kong Subtitles on Facebook and twitter. Enjoy!

It's like they're looking right through the screen at me!

This first date is going smoothly...

What a little pig, literally!

I think I saw something like that in Tijuana once...

Can you imagine his mother calling for him? "FUCK! FUCK! DINNER TIME, FUCK!"

40 - 50% of malliages end in dirorce.

Everybody have fun tonight! Everybody Wang Puke tonight!

"What, you're dead? You die easy!"

What the FU..?!?!? Matching Escort (1982)

Welcome to the first installment of "What the FU..?!?!?" WTF is it you ask? Well, it's a showcase of some crazy, whacked out scenes from various kung fu movies. You know, the kind that make you scratch your head and ask yourself "What the hell just happened?" Then of course you rewind, and watch a few more times before giving up hope of ever understanding. These are the type of scenes that I find most entertaining, and I hope you'll enjoy them too!

This clip comes from the movie "Matching Escort" (AKA Fury of the Silver Fox). Directed by and starring Pearl Cheung, and also starring Meng Fei, this flick is a real trip. Basically a revenge story, Pearl's parents are murdered, and she's taken under the wing of Silver Fox, who teaches her some strange type of LSD-laden psycho kung fu in his magical flower and smoke filled cave! She then sets out and learns her friend the Prince (Meng Fei) has been kidnapped. Pearl heads off to save him, and together they get their revenge! This movie's got crazy sets, costumes, action, and just an overall cool strangeness that must be seen! Well... this clip might give you an idea...

"Old Man.... Cow?? Peanut!!!" HUH?